tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-880716367641540716.post6653033435608843530..comments2023-06-17T04:09:19.944-05:00Comments on Bird in a Box: Comparisons only lead to overstretchingMiss Janehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13659603837343456631noreply@blogger.comBlogger7125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-880716367641540716.post-31808871146595793632011-07-29T18:37:08.327-05:002011-07-29T18:37:08.327-05:00Thank you all for your comments. I did this in fu...Thank you all for your comments. I did this in fun, but it would be interesting to see if I could rework this in an iambic form.Miss Janehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13659603837343456631noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-880716367641540716.post-73653140057685422932011-07-29T09:48:20.278-05:002011-07-29T09:48:20.278-05:00Well you certainly succeeded with the message and ...Well you certainly succeeded with the message and the rhyme scheme. It has its own melody and a kind of bouncing meter so it's close to rhyme royal; however when I wrote "usually" I meant that it is sometimes written in tetrameter rather than pentameter. There may be an odd anapest for meaning but the usual foot is iambic.<br /><br />However while there are a fair number of iambic feet here, you also have a lots of trochees throughout particularly at the beginning of lines. Also,your lines are not equal in length or really pentameter at all, but quite irregular.<br /> <br />Yet I am really glad you came, read, linked and commented. That is the dedication to poetry we appreciate. Thank you for doing so.Beachannyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08638256396472533685noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-880716367641540716.post-56353068268981794282011-07-29T09:22:14.907-05:002011-07-29T09:22:14.907-05:00Fascinating metaphor, deftly presented in the Rhym...Fascinating metaphor, deftly presented in the Rhyme Royal form. The image, the rhythm, the idea -- all woven with great artistry.<br /><br />DavidAnonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-880716367641540716.post-22640218657088064482011-07-29T03:10:52.730-05:002011-07-29T03:10:52.730-05:00"If possible, hold on to something.." is..."If possible, hold on to something.." is always good advice, especially if you end up over-extending. I like the last line, especially. Whether technically royal or not, definitely entertaining rhyme.hedgewitchhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13090696134322515899noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-880716367641540716.post-13610162678816907882011-07-29T03:05:43.770-05:002011-07-29T03:05:43.770-05:00PS I love 'found' poems.PS I love 'found' poems.Rosemary Nissen-Wadehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05913841031559499568noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-880716367641540716.post-19532724798594932792011-07-29T03:04:18.117-05:002011-07-29T03:04:18.117-05:00Miss Jane, I love it! (Must show it to my friend w...Miss Jane, I love it! (Must show it to my friend who teaches yoga.) It's only 'usually' in iambic pentameter, so I think you have done a legit. rhyme royal. I must have a try at the rhyme without the usual meter, myself, now that I've seen how delightfully you managed it.Rosemary Nissen-Wadehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05913841031559499568noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-880716367641540716.post-84025617808819937032011-07-28T19:44:10.701-05:002011-07-28T19:44:10.701-05:00The rhyme royal stanza consists of seven lines, (u...The rhyme royal stanza consists of seven lines, (usually) in iambic pentameter. The rhyme scheme is a-b-a-b-b-c-c.Miss Janehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13659603837343456631noreply@blogger.com